The Art Of Grinding For Self-Pleasure

One of the earliest masturbation memories many of us have is grinding on a pillow or against the sofa, an innocent act of exploration that started many of our journeys into self-pleasure and learning what we liked.

It’s true…

When we talk about grinding (okay, we rarely talk about it!), it is often something we associate with our younger years – perhaps it was something you did before you knew what sex or masturbation was.

It was a pure and innocent way of exploring your body, playing with the new pleasure buttons you discovered (perhaps during bath time) and enjoying the new sensations in an area of your body you simply hadn’t touched before – your vulva.

Whether you internalized that you were doing something ‘dirty’ or not…

Do you remember yourself grinding against something and building up arousal?

Have you continued enjoying time with yourself as an adult?

Wherever you are in your journey of overcoming vaginismus, it’s time to chase your pleasure through grinding!

And I say chase because through grinding, you can be the one selecting the perfect angle, speed, and intensity at every moment to maximize your pleasure. You deserve to be the director (and lead actor) in your most exciting turn-on scenes! And intuitively guiding yourself into that can help you trust your body. After all, your hips don’t lie!

This chase of your pleasure doesn’t have to be a thing of the past.

Grinding is the perfect sexual act for fellow vaginismus sisters looking to explore themselves without penetration.

There are multiple reasons for this!

Grinding can be used as a beautiful opportunity to tap into your sensuality and sexuality and actively involve your whole body in the experience without expecting your body to welcome something inside of itself.

It offers you the chance to practice without a partner as you ease your body into the idea of penetration. Grinding against a vibrator or pillow literally allows you to rock your hips back and forth to mimic penetrative sex, helping you discover how to take what you need for your pleasure.. And building up your confidence to enjoy being on top without fear! In fact, you can explore plenty of sex positions at your own pace before taking the step with partner.

Allowing you to feel more at ease when you make the jump to PIV sex!

From a physical standpoint, grinding helps you to explore your vulva in a way that you rarely do, allowing you to find new pleasurable areas. It can also be a chance to get acquainted with stimulation at the opening of the vagina!

However you like to play with it and no matter where you are in your vaginismus journey, grinding is not just a way to heal but a way to reclaim your pleasure and better understand your body. It can serve as an act of rebellious pleasure – one in which you can reclaim your sexual confidence and actively take what you need in the powerful position of being on top.

In fact…

Grinding is one of the most popular positions when masturbating as it recreates the control that you can gain from being on top during sex.

Where you decide the depth and speed all through the roll of your hips.

And as a fellow vaginismus sister, I know you prefer being in control. The act of surrendering is something many of us struggle with!

So…

If self-pleasure was an act you either didn’t engage in or you did so secretly in a dark room as a teenager while moving through confusing layers of shame mixed with pleasure, reclaiming your pleasure through grinding can also be a safe and less likely to be triggering path to healing on an emotional level!

It’s time to shamelessly explore new sensations along your clitoris, labia and around the opening of your vagina. Through grinding, it’s time to build up confidence for penetrative sex as you master the movements of your hips that bring the best sensations. It’s time to get creative and explore your body at your own pace.

How?

By being more intentional about the art of grinding and upping the variety of this practice by using toys designed specifically for grinding!

If you’re looking to up your clitoral game and return to the innocence of exploring your pleasure through grinding, wands as well as clitoral vibrators may be the perfect way to add a little extra spice to a grinding session.

Perhaps you’d like to consider two amazing options for this adventure! One wand and one clitoral vibrator.

A Wand Option For Grinding Self-Pleasure

When it comes to wands, they are fantastic options if you’re still wary about PIV sex because they can be used to stimulate and relax the nerves across the vulva, including the opening of the vagina.

Wands typically have bigger heads that allow you to lay them down on a surface and press your entire vulva against them, helping you to learn all the pleasure spots on your vulva and keep your hands free to explore the rest of your body…

All to help get you used to the sensation.

They also offer deep, rumbly vibrations!

Meet our contestant from the wand category.

Powerful and elegant, the We-Vibe Wand 2 has elevated the wand vibrator! With a powerful motor offering deep, rumbly vibrations that can be spread across your body as a full-body massage or pressed firmly to your vulva and clitoris.

You can set it against a pillow or surface and grind your vulva against the smooth head, controlling the vibration speeds and patterns as you learn what new sensations you can create on your vulva to set your toes curling.

The more elongated head and pleasured ribs are the perfect choice for those looking to up their grinding game. You can easily set it down and move against it, using the buttons or the app to control the speed and vibration patterns.

As well, its Smart Silence setting helps reduce the vibration overwhelm and makes getting in position to grind even easier. This new technology allows the vibrations to start when the wand is pressed against the skin.

Ease Of Use

Though it has a few more options that the typical vibrator, it’s easy to use!

Simply press the following buttons to switch between the different vibration settings. Or if you connect it to the app via Bluetooth, you can also use your phone to easily change the speeds.

Vibrations

This is one of the most powerful motors I have ever encountered. It offers powerful, rumbling vibrations in 10 different intensities.

To personalize your experience, you can even use the app to make the wand vibrate in time with your favourite songs!

Ease Of Charging

It comes with a magnetic USB charging cable that easily stays on. A light also serves as an indicator during the charging process.

Discreetness

Considering its Smart Silence feature which activates vibrations only upon skin contact, the We-Vibe Wand 2 is THE most discreet wand I’ve come across.

It’s also classified as Whisper Quiet even while its vibrating.

Ease of Cleaning

The We-Vibe Wand 2 is waterproof and made of 100% safe body silicone, allowing easy cleaning with a sex toy cleaner or warm water.

Aesthetic

It has a long body for easy use when holding and a long head with pleasure ridges that can be pressed firmly against a larger area or directly to the clitoris. It comes in a stylish purple.

Price (in USD)

The We-Vibe Wand 2 is listed at $169 on Lovehoney, which puts it in the luxury pleasure category.

And another amazing choice for a grinding-friendly sex toy..

A Clitoral Vibrator Option

If you prefer something smaller, clitoral stimulators are perfect for the pinpoint accuracy of either rumbly or buzzy vibrations.

Described as a lay-on clit vibrator, Womanizer has designed the perfect clitoral vibrator for grinding – the Womanizer Vibe.

The Womanizer Vibe for example offers deadly accuracy as it steadily pulses against your vulva with lovely rumbly vibrations.

You can simply lay it on a pillow and mold the body against your vulva to rock against the ‘pleasure edges’ to stimulate all your nerve endings as you enjoy precise vibrations against your clitoris.