We ALL have different parts of ourselves that want to come out and play! 😈 🖤
To be experienced freely.
Our nervous systems are WIRED differently to finding safety and then turn-on…
That’s why each of us craves unique kinds of arousal styles, types of touch and even language for turn-on! And no ONE preference is inferior to another.
🧖♀️ 🕯 Some of us absolutely NEED relaxing music and a massage before we have our genitals touched. In fact, having our genitals touched TOO early can be a turn-off! (Could also lead to a freeze response.)
Some of us would have no patience for a massage and would just want to ‘get it on’! And leave the massage for later..
And as you’ve likely experienced, mismatches of these preferences can bring on a slew of challenges in a relationship..
Yet another category of us need a sense of INTENSITY to achieve turn-on.
Intensity helps us relinquish the control that we’re used to holding onto. To become SO present in the moment that we can surrender to pleasure. 🤤
Unfortunately…
For example, intense play (like dominance and submission) has been labelled as an underground activity that only the ‘wild’ red-light-district-type ‘rebel’ community prides itself in. ⛓
In most circles, BDSM is a dirty word.
So naturally, anyone who finds this sort of play exciting is led to think that their desires are ones to be ashamed of. 🙊 😥
But this path to turn-on SIMPLY adds a much desired intensity to an experience! The shame ASSOCIATED WITH IT is the problem!
It’s time to embrace ALL parts of yourself that want to be expressed.
Perhaps a naughty costume, in public or in private, is the perfect place to start. 😁
– Katrin, with Love